3 Simple Keys to 'Woo' that Waitress on Wheels

Greetings Gents,

We've all been there - standing over a shot with our mind elsewhere thanks to that cute beverage girl patiently waiting on the adjacent cart path for your order. You're not thinking about the shot; you're thinking about something clever to say to her as you exit the tee box and walk towards her idle service station. Well boys, it's time to turn your beverage cart bogey to a beverage cart birdie! Here's 3 tips to help you out:

Tip 1: Buy Something
When the Waitress on Wheels comes through to your group for the first round of the day, ORDER SOMETHING, even if you don't really need or want it. This way you can start a tab and get in some good quick conversation early in the round. Don't wait until the end of your day to strike up a conversation because all she will really be thinking is that you are a waste of time for not buying anything from her earlier on. If you buy early, she will have your credit card and knows you will be buying so she will be back more frequently to serve you and the other three gentleman you are golfing with. Lastly to my point: She will need you to sign your receipt at the end of the day which is a great time for you to ask for her number.

Tip 2 - Avoid Talking About Golf
Try your hardest to avoid "Golf" as the topic of your discussions. This poor girl does not care that you birdied the last hole or that you can out drive the other guys in your group. I understand it is hard to come up with something else to talk about but get creative. She is going to get the same lines and questions from all the other old dirty men who are going to hit on her that day...so be unique!

Tip 3 - The Back 9 Maneuver
Find out early on in the day if she is working the entire course or just the nine that you are on. A lot of courses will have two cart girls so you might only have 9 holes to seal the deal. (DO NOT HIT ON BOTH OF THEM!) These girls definitely talk throughout the day and you will sewer yourself if you try your game with both of them. That being said if you can pull it off let me know. (Free pair of Kikkors!) If it is just one girl working the entire course then wait until later in the day to ask her out. Even if she says yes early all you can do is ruin things with stupid comments for the remainder of the day. Remember: Flirt Early! Close Late!

Happy Hunting!!!

- Wheeler

P.S. A pair of Kikks will help you get noticed. My choice - Eppik White: